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The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers
is just off the press!
It includes many ways to
help your one-to-six year old child get in bed, stay in bed, and
sleep all night – by providing no-cry solutions for:
Bedtime battles, dawdling, and evening melt-downs
Night waking and early rising
Moving out of the crib and into a big-kid bed
Graduating from the family bed to independent sleep
Ending the all-night breastfeeding routine
Stopping nighttime visits to your bed
Handling naptime problems
Solving nightmares, separation anxiety and fears
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“I
don’t need an alarm clock. Every day my daughter wakes up early –
usually before 6:00. Is there
any way to get her to sleep longer, or is she just an early bird?”
It is true that
some children seem to be natural early birds, but only about 10% to
15% actually have a biological tendency to be a complete lark.
Another small percentage is somewhat larkish, but most early-rising
children are simply waking up early for outside reasons that affect
their rising time, and these can be changed.
You may be able
to tell if your little one is
really a lark is if she:
- wakes up on
her own -- cheerful and chatty
- is most
active and energetic in the late morning to early afternoon
- sleeps
soundly
- gets tired
after dinner
- goes to bed
early and easily
- wakes up
early no matter what time she goes to bed
If this describes
your child, you may indeed have a little lark on your hands. Even
so, you might be able to squeeze a bit more sleep time in the
morning if you make some changes in your child’s routines by
applying the ideas that follow. If your early-riser doesn’t fit the
previous description it’s likely that she’s not a natural-born lark
and you’ll have good luck encouraging a later wake-up time.
First things first
One of the common
reasons for early waking is simply that your child has had enough
sleep! Take a good
look at the sleep chart and add up your child’s night and nap hours
of sleep. If your two-year-old is napping for two hours and then
getting an average amount of hours of sleep at nighttime, that would
be 11 night sleep hours. If she is going to bed at 7:00 P.M., guess
what? Eleven hours later…it’s 6:00 A.M.! (Remember, too that “early”
has a different definition for everyone; many people arise at 5:00
A.M. or even before that, without considering it too early.)
Even if your
child is getting less than the sleep hours on the chart she may be
one of those rare children who need a bit less sleep than the
average. In either case you can’t expect her to sleep longer in the
morning simply because you
went to bed at midnight or were up all night with her baby brother,
and you’re still tired. (Oh, but if it only worked that way!) If
this is the case in your house, you have two options. Gradually move
her bedtime later by about 10 or 15 minutes until she’s going to bed
an hour later and (hopefully!) waking an hour later in the morning.
If you’ve already read the first part of this book you know that an
earlier bedtime is often best for a child, and sometimes a bedtime
change won’t affect awakening time, but you certainly can experiment
with this to see if you can find a happy medium that works for both
of you.
The other choice,
of course, is to make your own bedtime earlier so that an earlier
wake up time works for you. This may be nicer than you think, since
most larks are cheerful in the morning and grumpy in the late
evening, so by adjusting your family hours you’ll have more time in
that happy place together.
Other reasons WHY your child may be
waking up early
If you’ve added
up your child’s sleep hours and have determined that an excess of
sleep isn’t the cause of early awakening you should be able to add
more sleep time in the early morning. Before we get into the general
tips for encouraging longer sleep, it may help to figure out why
your child wakes up early, and how to address those issues. Here are
a few things that might be waking her up:
-
Light.
Daylight, street lights or house lights can cause a light
sleeper to wake up.
Solution: Cover the windows, keep the room dark.
-
Noise.
Some children are easily roused when they hear voices, traffic,
pets, plumbing sounds, or neighbors.
Solution: Use a radio set to a classical music or talk show
station, or a white-noise machine to mask outside noises. You
can set it like an alarm to go off on a quiet volume about an
hour before your child’s typical awakening time so that other
noises don’t rouse her. (Don’t worry – if you are using white
noise or keeping the volume low this won’t wake her.) Another
option, if you can, is changing your child’s sleeping place to a
quieter room.
-
Nature calls?
Perhaps her diaper, training pants, or pull-ups are wet, or she
has to use the bathroom.
Solution: Give your child less liquid in the hour or two before
bed. Provide several pre-bedtime potty visits. Use diaper
doublers or extra-thick nighttime diapers. If she’s totally
potty-trained, teach her how to use the bathroom by herself
during the night and leave a nightlight on in the hallway. She
may not even realize that she’s able to do this on her own if
she never has!
-
Comfort.
Her covers have fallen off, the house has cooled down and she’s
chilly, or the heat has come on and she’s too hot.
Solution: Adjust the heat level of the house, use a fan (keeping
it and cords out of reach) or change what she wears to bed or
the types of blankets on her bed.
-
Hunger.
Her tummy rumblings wake her.
Solution: Give her a low-sugar, high-carbohydrate snack before
bedtime. Provide her with a bowl of crackers and a cup of water
on her nightstand.
-
Habit.
She’s been waking up early for a long time and now her internal
clock alarm goes off at that time.
Solution: Gradually adjust her night and nap sleep schedule
until she is sleeping and waking at a better time.
-
Nap routine.
She’s napping too early, too late, too often, or too long.
Solution: Reorganize her nap schedule according to the
information in the chapter about naptime issues.
Mother-Speak:
“I put a
piece of cardboard over the window and set a clock-radio to
early morning classical music. Sebastian is sleeping about an
hour later in the morning than he was – and it hasn’t affected
his bedtime at all!”
Candice,
mother of three-year-old Sebastian
More tips for encouraging longer
sleep
Very often an
early waking child is doing so out of habit, and it may take a few
weeks of consistent changes before you see a new wake-up time
emerge. Be patient and use the following tips in conjunction with
the previous list and the general ideas in the first part of this
book:
-
Apply the concepts covered
previously and re-set your child’s biological clock. Do this by
keeping the hour before bedtime dimly lit, sleeping time dark,
and breakfast time brightly lit.
-
Keep your child’s room dark
during all the hours you want her to sleep. Use blinds,
curtains, or even a blanket or big pieces of cardboard to keep
out unwanted light. Do your pre-bedtime reading by the dimmest
light possible, and finish it up with story-telling in the dark.
-
Schedule
playtime in the afternoon or
early evening outside when you can. When you can’t get outside
keep the play area brightly lit. You may even want to invest in
a natural sunlight lamp which emits a yellow sun-like glow.
-
Try treating the early morning
awakening as if it’s
2:00 A.M. and respond to your
child as you do with a night waking. If the windows are covered
and the room is dark your child may accept that it’s the middle
of the night and not the morning.
-
Children who wake
early often nap early, too, going for a nap within an hour or
two of waking up. This is actually the end of their nighttime
sleep! Try holding off the morning nap by 15 to 30 minutes every
day until it falls an hour or two hours later in the day than it
is now. After a week or two you should see a new pattern emerge.
-
Hold off breakfast
for thirty minutes to an hour after your child wakes up. She may
have set her “hunger alert” to go off at
6:00 A.M. By holding off breakfast
in the morning you may be able to re-set the time she gets
hungry. If she can’t wait that long, try a small snack, like a
few crackers, and delay a full breakfast for a bit.
-
Maintain a
consistent bedtime and awaking time seven days a week. Changing
the schedule each weekend will likely prevent you from finding
success at getting a reasonable wake up time during the week.
What to do if your lark continues to
wake up early
If you’ve tried
these ideas, and kept with them for a few weeks, but find that your
little rooster continues to wake up early, you may want to accept
that it’s her natural waking time and approach the problem
differently. Here are some tips:
- Every night,
after your child goes to sleep put a box of toys next to her
bed. Rotate these so that there’s always something new and
interesting in the box. Tell her that when she wakes up she can
check her box and play with whatever she finds in there. Be
creative, but make sure the toys are safe, and of course,
nothing noisy! (If your child is still sleeping in a crib you
can leave toys at the foot of the crib.)
- Set a
clock-radio to a pleasant music station and have it turn on at
your acceptable wake up time. Tell your child that she can’t
leave her bedroom to wake you up until she hears the music.
- Leave a
sippy cup of water and a snack, such as crackers, on her bedside
so that when she wakes up she will have something to eat. (No
choking hazards.)
- Make a tape
recording of your child’s favorite songs or stories and show her
how to operate the machine. Let her listen to her special tape
when she wakes up.
- Invite her
into your room or your bed. Tell her that if she wakes up she
can come quietly into your room. Let her climb in bed and
snuggle with you, or create a little resting area with a
sleeping bag on the floor for her. You might even create a fort,
such as using a blanket over a card table, and call it her
morning nest. Put a few toys and books inside and see if she’ll
play quietly for a while before waking you.
- Childproof,
childproof, childproof! Make sure that your entire house is safe
for your early riser so if she’s wandering around while you’re
still asleep she won’t get herself into trouble.
- Practice.
Once you’ve established some ideas for what you’d like to have
happen in the morning, let your child show you exactly what
she’ll do when she gets up. By role-playing a few times she’ll
be comfortable doing as you wish when she wakes up so early in
the morning – playing with her toys, climbing in bed with you,
playing in her fort, or listening to her music.
Will my lark EVER sleep later?
Oh, yes. Your
lark will begin
sleeping later in the morning….once she starts school and is
required to wake up at 6:00 AM. Frustrating, but true! As children
get older many of them go through an Owl stage – finding it hard to
fall asleep at a reasonable bedtime, but easy to sleep until noon.
This
article is a copyrighted excerpt from
The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers
by
Elizabeth Pantley
(McGraw-Hill, 2005). |
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